CONFIRM – Andrew Baumgartner

It is part of human nature to ask where we come from, and why things are the way they are. The simple answers that people seek are ones that pertain to religion and science. These theories, although they bring very compelling and convincing arguments to the table, provide none of the hard evidence that the idea of Reptilian Shape-Shifters has. For those of you that do not know much about these creatures, they are human-reptile hybrids that have been on the Earth since before humans. They have worked their way up from just simple humanoid aliens, to shape-shifters that have infiltrated their way into the government and society. Wherever you look, wherever you walk, wherever you think you are safe, there is a Reptillian hiding, in the form of someone you love, or someone who has more power than you. It is haunting to think that such creatures can posses such power, and that our “advanced” technology cannot do anything to harm them because they are intelligent beings that have evolved much more than us lowly humans. For now, all we can do is bite our tongues and hope that they do not try to harm us, but instead decide to teach us their ways, so we too can become as evolved as they are.

DENY – Katie Hires

There are many outlandish conspiracy theories out there today – the Loch Ness Monster, the Lost City of Atlantis, Bigfoot – but none are as audacious as the theory that Reptilian Shape-Shifting aliens have infiltrated top levels American government. There are pictures of Nessie and Sasquatch – but the photo ‘evidence’ that believers in Reptilians swear by are nothing more than unflattering images of politicians from odd angles. A man with wrinkles isn’t wearing a human skin-suit – he’s just old. People like to invest themselves in ideas; normal people devote themselves to religion or philosophies, but crazy people like immersing themselves into the obsession that goes along with conspiracy. Believing that our President, or anyone else, is a Reptilian Shape-Shifter is comparable to believing that Dr. Cosentino is secretly a winged unicorn. Though we all secretly long for that to be true, we have to admit that it isn’t. At least that conspiracy would be a somewhat happy one. But why anyone would want to believe in Reptilian Shape-Shifters is almost as foggy as why they actually do.