Ask Carol – October 2017
November 2, 2017
Forgotten Friend
Hi Carol, my friends keep hanging out without me and then they talk about their plans or what they did right in front of me. I don’t think they’re trying to hurt my feelings, they just don’t think to invite me. How do I get myself invited to go out with them? I don’t want to seem whiny or force myself on them.
Hello! This is a toughy. I’d be lying if I said I’ve never felt this way, so I completely understand where you’re coming from. The first thing you could do is start to plan things in the group, like ask everyone if they want to go see a movie. This will put you on their radar, and then when they make future plans you’re more likely to be invited. If they still don’t realize what they’re doing, you should bring it up to them. You’re right, they may not realize what they’re doing and feel bad about it after you tell them. However, I must say that I’m not the biggest fan of these friends of yours. What they’re doing goes against common courtesy, and if they continue to do this to you despite your best efforts, then I would encourage you to reach out to new people. You deserve friends that invite you without even thinking about it. I know it may seem scary to make new bonds, but it may make you happier in the long run.
Stressed Senior
I’m a senior and I’m freaking out about college. I have a lot of school work to do and now college applications, plus all the stuff I do after school. How do I manage my time better? I still want to have free time and not stay up late every night to do my work.
Hi there! This sounds to me like a tale as old as time. There’s so much on your plate right now, and it’s hard because this is your senior year. This is the time to have a little more fun! What I would recommend is making a list and ranking your work from most to least important. Is that extra credit English project as important as your math packet that’s due tomorrow? Probably not. I would also recommend focusing on work due the next day first. If your civics class drops out the next day and it’s already 11pm, maybe it would be worth finishing tomorrow. Also remember college applications are going to be over soon enough, meaning that your workload will be lightened even more by the end of the semester at the latest. Lastly, I would recommend that if you don’t already have a study hall, try and make room for one. It may only be an hour, but it helps you make a dent in that pile of work that you have for that night. Other than that, keep up the good work! It’s great to be motivated and to be doing so much, and it will pay off in the future.